Mars, please.

Did you know that it is not all that difficult to become an astronaut for NASA? I didn’t, at least not until NASA posted on their Facebook page that they are hiring for astronauts. I like their page. I am privy to all the most important and really cool photos of Earth and space. They share these photos with JUST me. I don’t want to brag or anything, but I’m kind of in their inner circle. You have to know someone. Anyway, here’s all it takes to become an astronaut:

1. Bachelor’s degree from an accredited institution in engineering, biological science, physical science, or mathematics. An advanced degree is desirable. Quality of academic preparation is important.

2. At least 1,000 hours pilot-in-command time in jet aircraft. Flight test experience is highly desirable.

3. Ability to pass a NASA space physical which is similar to a military or civilian flight physical and includes the following specific standards:

• Distant visual acuity: 20/100 or better uncorrected, correctable to 20/20 each eye.
• Blood pressure: 140/90 measured in a sitting position.
• Height between 62 and 75 inches.

If I could go anywhere, it would be the International Space Station and/or Mars. I’m not picky. Either of those destinations is fine with me. If I have laser eye surgery, lose a hundred pounds, and get a smart-people degree, I could totally do this. I meet the blood pressure and height requirements, already. I’m, like, halfway there, wouldn’t you say?

I suppose if I couldn’t find myself on a Mars expedition, I may as well head to the Grand Canyon. I have GOT to remember to pack a selfie stick, though. Of course, I do have to purchase one, first. Remind me to do that before I get in my car, okay? I probably won’t go to the Grand Canyon, though. Honestly, I don’t like hot weather. I’m more of a rain and cool weather kind of gal. I guess I would love to see Alaska. Or Germany. They’re practically the same, right? No? Oh well. Take me there, anyway, please. Danke Schoen.

The Wanderer

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